Advisory for Husbands: Dare NOT, to Stare!

A copy of an Advisory issued by IIWA (India Inc. Wives’ Association)  to IIHA (India Inc. Husbands’ Association) has been received from a reliable source who has requested not to be named.

The text of the ‘Advisory’ is placed below.

To,

President,

India Inc. Husbands’ Association.

Date: 16 January, 2025

Sub: Advisory for IIHA members.

Dear President,

On behalf of IIWA, I convey hearty greetings for the New Year to you and your distinguished members. We sincerely hope and pray that  2025 may bring you success, fame, and happiness, both at work and at home.

The following Advisory, unanimously approved by an Extra-ordinary General Body Meeting of IIWA, may be brought to the notice of all your members for necessary action and strict compliance.

Advisory

1.   Husbands are advised that staring amounts to ocular assault, and may note that wives do NOT consent to be stared at. Anyone who stares, on Sunday or any other day, at our honourable member at home or elsewhere; would be promptly outstared. Obsessive-Compulsive starers may keep a golden statuette of own spouse, à la Golden Sita, in their office drawer.

(Amul Ad in ET-15/01/2025) (Blogger's comment: But, butter melts only when bread is hot!)

2.   Husbands must be grateful, and periodically exhibit their gratitude, for having a very intelligent, beautiful, smart, and talented woman as spouse; and always remember that she is an autonomous person, no arm-candy to meekly accompany them to business lunches and dinners.

3.   An internal survey has revealed that our members are constrained to log in 100 hours or more of work with seven-day weeks round the year, and yet are poorly compensated for their untiring work; whereas men are raising a hue and cry over 70/90 work-hours a week!

4.   Since she manages her own Company, Charitable Trust, numerous social welfare and club activities, provides to husband healthy nutrition, minds his laundry, keeps his wardrobe fashionable and well-stocked (when did any husband ever buy a pair of socks?); she has a hectic daily schedule. Should a husband solicit her company at important events, request must be sent to her PA at least a month in advance.

5.   Should a husband wish to meet her at home on Sunday or any other day; purpose of proposed meeting, duration, and venue (drawing room, dining room, bedroom) must be mentioned.

6.   Husbands must share their detailed daily schedule with spouse, and provide real-time access to their GPS location when out of home. All unscheduled meetings, trysts, and rendezvouses must be reported.

7.   Husbands must share passcodes to unlock their phone and laptop.

8.   Husbands must take our mandatory online Refresher Courses: (1) How to be Productive at Home; and (2) How to achieve Domestic Happiness & Peace. Tests for these courses must be passed with Grade A or above (Grades A+,A++,& A+++).

9.    Husbands must submit Monthly, Quarterly, and Yearly ‘Home Productivity Self-Appraisal’ Report in our prescribed format; making sure to specify the ‘Quality Time’ they spent with spouse for period under reporting.

10.                  Husbands who snore (most husbands do, but vehemently deny it!); must sleep in the spare bedroom.

11.                  Our Association has unanimously resolved to celebrate each Sunday as No-Work Day, ME-Day, Serene Sunday- fully dedicated to the holistic health and wellbeing of our members, unencumbered by spouse, children, and domestic chores. Group and individual activities to be held include Yoga, Meditation, Relaxation & Detox massage, Zumba session with a personal trainer, Laughter-Chat-Gossip sessions, Nature Walk, music therapy, etc.

Protocol for ‘Serene Sunday’: phones on mute, no TV, no cooking at home, cook granted weekly-off. Our members would be on a liquid diet- only juices and other beverages. Should the husband be at home and feel hungry, he may request the gardener or the security guard to order a burger or biryani from Swiggy or Zomato. 

Venue for Home sessions- Prayer-cum-Meditation Chamber with dim lighting, and soothing Om chanting; entry permitted after bath, and on bare feet. Husbands are welcome to join spouse in the Meditation Chamber subject to strictly complying with the above-mentioned protocol.

12.                  Husbands must NOT:

a.   bring work-related tension home

b.   bring laptop to bedroom

c.    make business phone calls from bedroom

d.   check phone messages at 3.00 AM (the blue flicker disturbs the sleep of your spouse)

e.   scatter shoes and socks all over the house

Please acknowledge receipt of this Advisory.

Thanking you,

Sincerely,

President, IIWA.

***

  

Postscript

Two of my esteemed readers tell me that my blog is ‘too one-sided.’ I agree. But my humorous and satirical one-sided-ness was in response to the sexist, outrageous, ‘stare’ comment by the L & T boss!

Kedar Rout, a thoughtful reader and a friend got this WhatsApp forward:

‘Someone needs to tell L&T head that if you work 90 hours & don’t stare at your wife, someone else will;’ to which his response was:

‘Ha.. Ha..here we get some clues from TS Eliot...

Lil's husband is coming back after 4 years serving in the war. Her friend is persuading Lil to spruce up a bit so that Albert (Lil's husband) will have a good time. She further warns 'if you can't give it to him, others will'....’

My note: I had forgotten that Lil was a character in ‘The Waste Land,’ and read Part 2 of the poem once again. Here’s a longer quote:

“…think of poor Albert,

He’s been in the army four years, he wants a good time,

And if you don’t give it him, there’s others will,…” (The Waste Land- Part II-A Game of Chess: T.S.Eliot).

Thanks, Dear Kedar, for that.

 

God’s Surname

What is God’s surname? The question had never occurred to me. I’m familiar with the 1000 names of major Hindu deities, the 99 names of Allah, and the names of Biblical divinities; but have never heard of a surname of any deity, Hindu or non-Hindu.

Ram and Krishna were both kshatriyas, yet they are not called Sri Ram Singh or Sri Krishna Singh Yadav. Ravan was a brahmin, but wasn’t called Ravan Chaturvedi. Proper names sufficed, surnames- an appendage invented by man- were unnecessary.

May I come up, please, he asked, didn’t wait for my reply, and rushed up, as usual, to my study on the first floor.

Have you finished your work? He asked.

Of course, my work is finished as soon as you enter my study, I said.

I know that. Let us now play. Look, I’ve a big truck. A real truck; smoke comes out from behind when it runs. See for yourself; he held a quick demo. He was thrilled with his newest toy- a gift he had received the day before on his fifth birthday.

I put aside the book I was reading, and he led me to the veranda. Before ‘play’ began, he said, ‘I love you, Uncle.’ The little master manipulator knows how to wrap Uncle around his little finger, and get him to do just anything.

I replied, ‘I love you, too, Yug Bhatt.’

No, I’m not Yug Bhatt, I’m Yug Sachan!’

But yesterday, you were Yug Bhatt!?

Now, I’m five; and now I’m Yug Sachan; he declared!

My Dad is Varun Sachan, Mom is Payal Bhatt Sachan, and I’m Yug Sachan. Got it? Don’t forget.

Do you know how far this truck can go?

No, I don’t.

He had left behind the remote control at his home, and manually manoeuvred to send the truck rushing forward.

Wow, very impressive, I said.

Let us now play ‘goal.’

But, that’s a truck, not a football!

Stand with your legs apart; like this, he gave a demo. That’s your goal-post. If my truck runs past it, I score a goal.

We played goal for a while. I stopped a goal or two, but let others score. He was thrilled.

You lost, he declared.

Time-out, please; I requested.

I had a mild cold, thought I might sneeze, and went to the adjoining room to fetch a kerchief from the wardrobe. He followed suit. At the puja alcove, two-feet above floor-level, he noticed the incense sticks which spouse had lit a few minutes ago by for Makara Sankranti puja.

He put down his truck, took off his crocs, sat on the stool in front of the puja alcove, folded his palms, and said, ‘Thank you, God, for giving us food.’

He noted me standing near with a bemused smile on my face, and continued with his prayer, ‘God Sachan, Thank you.’

Who told you God’s name is God Sachan?

No one, I just know. And you are Uncle Sachan.

Yug Sachan had comprehended and imbibed Advaita Vedanta philosophy, and had delivered his first sermon to Uncle Sachan!

***

 

Gita Counselling: Supreme Healer’s Public Therapy

 

Gita Counselling:
Supreme Healer’s Public Therapy

Gita: Meaning

Gita generally refers to the Bhagavadgītā. However, Gita is a generic name ‘for certain sacred writings in verse, often in the form of a dialogue and devoted to the exposition of particular religious and theosophical doctrines; e.g. शिवगीता, रामगीता, भगवद्गीता’ (V.S. Apte).

Bhagavad Gita appears in the Bhishma Parva, the Sixth Book of the Mahabharata. There are 24 other Gitas in the Mahabharata including the Anu Gita (Ashvamedha Parva) where Arjuna prays to Sri Krishna for a reiteration of Bhagavad Gita. I have  forgotten your teachings, he submits; Krishna chides him for being so neglectful and forgetful, and says, listen once more, be attentive; but I won’t reiterate with comprehensive details as earlier.

The Gita sermon- transcendental knowledge of Yoga, ancient and mysterious- was first taught by Sri Bhagavan to Vivaswan (the Sun god) who taught it to Manu, the father of mankind, who taught it to King Ikshvaku; and thus, the wisdom was transmitted down the ages through the revered Guru-shishya Parampara. However, in course of time, this supreme knowledge was lost (4.1 & 4.2). Sri Krishna delivered the sermon twice to Arjuna- once prior to the commencement of the Mahabharata war, and again as Anu Gita.  

There are many other Gitas in the Ramayana, the Puranas, with some Gitas existing as independent texts.

Gita Upanishad

Though not one of the ten principal Upanishads, Gita is called an Upanishad since it is structured as one. Upanishad means ‘sitting down near’ referring to the shishya seated at the feet of his Guru. Upanishads are in Q & A format with the shishya asking questions and the Guru leading him to understanding.  

Arjuna, the shishya would ask questions; Sri Krishna, the Guru, would explain with patience, empathy, and compassion, and remove Arjuna’s confusion and doubts. Notably, Krishna addresses Arjuna as sakha (friend), and bhakta (devotee), extending and expanding the Guru-shishya relationship.

(Source: Wikimedia Commons- Sri Krishna preaching Gita Upadesh to Arjun - Unknown, Miniature Painting, Kashmir School - Google Cultural Institute- Date-1875-1900)

Who says What?

Gita is structured as reportage by Sanjay for Dhritarastra’s benefit. Sanjay was granted Divya Drishti – virtual audio-visual access to the battlefield – to give a blow-by-blow account to Dhritarastra whose blindness was physical as well as moral.

Gita is essentially Shrikrishna’s sermon, with 574  of the 700 shlokas delivered by Krishna. Arjuna has 85 shlokas of which the most are in C-11 (33), and C-1 (21); in the remaining, he asks a few questions responding to which Srikrishna expounds on different aspects of the mysterious and sacred Yoga, guiding Arjuna and other humans to navigate the turbulent seas of life.  Sanjay’s role is not insignificant; he has 40 shlokas; and  Dhritarastra has only one, the opening shloka.

Gita Therapy

Bhagavad Gita is much more than a religious sermon, and may be appreciated as psychological counselling- the world’s first therapeutic session; administered in an emergency to a valiant warrior who had suffered an unforeseen nervous breakdown; open-air, public therapy viewed by millions of warriors; and completed in a single session with guaranteed healing!

With no couch available, Arjuna sat down on the floor of his ratha. He was confused, torn with doubts about the right course of action for him, sad, dejected, depressed, and declared his resolve not to fight. Tormented by moral dilemmas, I surrender myself to you, please instruct me, he prayed.

A significant departure from the typical Upanishadic setting of Guru-shishya dialogue in Q & A mode. Kurukshetra was a battlefield where rivers of blood would soon flow, no hermitage with a relaxed ambience conducive to teaching-learning. Krishna was no rishi or a regular Guru in his ashram; he was very much a man of the world, a master strategist, and an invaluable ally, Arjuna’s relative (cousin), and a friend (sakha). But Arjuna had surrendered as a devotee and sought his guidance as Guru. At that point, Arjuna was unaware that Krishna was the Supreme One; Krishna would reveal his identity later during the session, and upon Arjuna’s prayer display his Vishwaroopa.

How did the session proceed? Arjuna had suffered a massive, crippling anxiety-attack, and was psychologically and physically not in a position to engage in war, not to speak of leading the Pandava army to victory. The 18 Chapters constitute 18 modules or phases of counselling- proceeding from basic to complex and intense. Chapter-2 is designed as a potent, effective dose to help Arjuna unlearn and discard fallacious assumptions, comprehend the ancient, mysterious knowledge imparted by Krishna, and act upon it.

Arjuna enumerates his anxieties and submits most of his queries in Chapters 1 & 2, but continues to seek clarifications till the very end, and the session concludes only when he declares that his confusions and delusions have been cleared by the competent counselling.

Therapy comprised audio lessons backed up with never-before-seen visual illustration- Vishwaroopa. Sanjay narrated full details of the session to Dhritarastra, and Veda Vyasa transcribed it for others to benefit from the wise counsel of Sri Bhagavan.

No medication was required; the problem was psychological; the counselling was healing- it cleared the cobwebs of anxiety and confusion; and the healing came from within Arjuna who steadied his mind.

Gita’s universal appeal is owing to its secular counselling, not limited to believers and practitioners of Sanatan Dharma; it transcends all religions, is relevant to humanity, and speaks meaningfully to the modern readers, too.

Memorable Similes*

Gita makes dexterous use of alankara, a poetic tool in Sanskrit literature. It has numerous profound upamas (similes and metaphors) to convey deep philosophical truths with simplicity and brevity. These similes often draw from nature, daily life, and spiritual metaphors, offering vivid imagery to explain abstract concepts.  

Here are a few examples:

A thousand suns arising simultaneously! A what-if scenario that defies imagination. How would that look like; are human eyes capable of handling such dazzling, blinding radiance? Surely not. But Sanjay having been granted divyadrishti could describe the divine radiance of the Supreme One in Chapter 11 of the Bhagavad Gita.

If the splendour of a thousand Suns was to blaze all at once (simultaneously) in the sky, that would be like the splendour of that Mighty Being (great soul). (11.12**)

Grieve not, tells Sri Krishna to Arjuna, for Death is not a terminal event, but a mere transition. Just as humans discard old, worn-out clothes and adorn new garments; the soul abandons the old, decaying body, and acquires a new body. Why worry about what is inevitable; for those born will die, and those who die will be reborn?

Just as a man casts off his worn out clothes and puts on new ones, so also the embodied-Self casts off its worn out bodies and enters others which are new. (2.22)

When, like the tortoise which withdraws its limbs from all sides, he withdraws his senses from the sense-objects then his Wisdom becomes steady. (2.58)

For, the mind, which follows in the wake of the wandering senses, carries away his discrimination, as the wind carries away a boat on the waters.(2.67)

He attains Peace into whom all desires enter as waters enter the ocean, which, filled from all sides, remains unmoved; but not the desirer of desires.(2.70)

As a lamp placed in a windless place does not flicker — is a simile used to describe the YOGI of controlled-mind practising YOGA of the Self (or absorbed in th e YOGA -of-the-Self). (6.19)

Song of God: Philosophy through Poetry

The Bhagavad Gita is of enduring appeal, not for Hindus alone. Of course, it is an important scriptural document; but it is much more than that. It is an eloquent song, where the distilled wisdom of the Vedas and Upanishads is woven into exquisite poetry, and composed in anustubh chanda for lyrical chanting. Philosophy made easy through poetry and song! Gita is thus eulogised in Gita Mahatmya:

सर्वोपनिषदो गावो दोग्धा गोपाल नन्दनः ।

पार्थो वत्सः सुधीर्भोक्ता दुग्धं गीतामृतं महत् ॥

All the Upanishads are the cows, Krishna the milkman, Arjuna the calf, and the discerning, diligent readers the partakers of this nectar.

Why are non-Hindus and non-religious persons also fascinated by Gita? Maybe, because Sri Krishna’s counsel includes many secular recommendations for a meaningful, balanced life; relevant to all humanity regardless of religion.

~~~

*Source for text in italics under this section is shlokam.org

** Verse Reference: Chapter-11 ,Verse-12.

~~~

1.   Bhagavad-Gita As It Is: A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada

2.   Sanskrit Documents.org

3.   Shlokam.org

4.   Sacred Songs: The Mahabharata’s Many Gitas (Rupa, 2023)– Bibek Debroy

5.   You Tube

6.   ChatGPT, CoPilot, and Gemini

 

Mind Your Daily DOSE: Be Happy!

 

Mind Your Daily DOSE: Be Happy!

Sarve bhavantu sukhinah

Sarve bhavantu sukhinah. That’s how a popular swasti mantra begins. Every being is entitled to happiness. A shanti mantra invokes peace for the entire universe including the Sky, Space, Earth, Waters, Plants, Trees; for holistic peace is unrealisable if the entire creation is not in sync and peace.

If the goal of life is to attain and enjoy happiness, what goes awry to create so much misery and unhappiness in the world?

What is Happiness?

Does the fulfilment of desires result in happiness? Does happiness accrue from owning valuable assets, or consuming the best products available: living in a premium villa, being transported from place A to B in a luxury sedan driven by a liveried-chauffeur, going off for exotic vacations, having the latest iPhone, or winning a fancy girlfriend? Desire is never satisfied by enjoyment, just as fire is never quenched by pouring ghee.

Happiness is insubstantial, intangible, impossible to capture, possess, or retain. It’s not a packaged product that can be bought off-the-shelf.

Happiness is a butterfly; chase it, it’ll fly away; sit still sipping your coffee in the sun-kissed garden, it may land on your arm; grab it, it dies. But some folks have strange tastes, they love to frame dead butterflies to beautify their homes! Happiness of man matters, not that of the butterfly!

Happiness is a tiny dew on a flower petal radiating the pure joy of a glorious sunshine. Touch it, the delicate dream vanishes. Happiness is each one of the two million flowers a worker bee visits in her lifetime to collect one-twelfth spoonful of honey. Happiness is the soul of a water-drop that ascends to heaven for rebirth as rain. Happiness is the flower that blooms to greet the sun or the moon. Happiness is the wind’s song in the orchestra of trees, mountains, and rivers. Happiness is rain from heaven, a gift, a blessing for all. It gurgles like a mountain stream, the water sprays cavorting with the rainbow colours.

Happiness is all around you, provided you’re not desperately looking for it.

Happy New Year (HNY)

How do you feel about HNY and other ‘Happy’ greetings and messages, mostly monotonous ‘Forwards,’ stripped of meaning and warmth, rather like the sad tangdi after the kebab has pleased the palates at the party.

If the billions of HNY messages exchanged globally were each a cubic centimetre of helium gas, the balloon of human happiness would be soaring now in ninth heaven; but alas, the deflated balloon is lying limp on the ground, damp from the dew. Why is that so? I guess you know the answer.

How about the hundreds of HNY messages you received from your contacts including your banks, and many service providers - Amazon, Blinkit, Ola, Uber, MakeMyTrip, Urbanclap, Zomato, Zerodha, Zepto, Plumber Bhole Tiwari, and Newspaper Agent Amit? Were you happy, delighted, thrilled, euphoric, ecstatic; or just fatigued from sending polite replies to important contacts and jaded emojis to the rest?

Even the hangover of the binge parties (last evening, we returned from one such party close to midnight coz dinner was served after 10.00 PM!) must be gone now. How do you feel? As happy as ever, or as harassed and lousy as usual?

Happiness ‘set’ point

Psychologists claim that each person has a happiness ‘set’ point to which she returns after periodic peaks and troughs. Win a lottery, get a promotion, you’ll get a ‘high’; verbally whipped by Boss, lost a friend or a dear one, you’ll feel ‘low’.

This theory claims that human happiness is determined - 50% by genetics, 10% by circumstances (personal health, profession, financial status, etc.), and 40% by lifestyle. Critics dismiss the ‘set’ point theory as too deterministic, and suggest that the brain adapts and recalibrates the happiness point, when given a chance. Anyway, lifestyle choices provide a large playing field, and can significantly boost happiness.

Mind your DOSE, Be Happy!

For scientists, Happiness is a cocktail of chemicals – the bundle of miracle hormones – Dopamine, Oxytocin, Serotonin, and Endorphin (DOSE) – that our body releases. If you facilitate your body to manufacture and circulate DOSE daily, you’re likely to feel happy.

For a quick primer on DOSE, an excellent link is:

https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/dopamine-the-pathway-to-pleasure

This piece is part of a series, and leads you to brief, informative pieces on the other hormones.

What can you do to be happy? Help your body to manufacture these essentials hormones through lifestyle choices: diet, exercise, rest, relaxation, and bonding.

•      Mindful eating and drinking. Avoid junk food, sugar-laced carbonated drinks, too much caffein or alcohol. Eat a healthy diet including mood-enhancing food. To boost each of the DOSE hormones, there are recommended foods.

•      EYM: Exercise, Yoga, and Meditation

•      Sleep: Adequate, restful sleep

•      Music, Laughter (Children laugh 200 to 300 times a day; adults only 20 or less!), Sunshine (totally free).

•      Social Bonding: Not the time you spend on social media, nor the number of followers you have on Facebook or Instagram. Have a few good friends. Engage in group activities.

•      Practice Positive Psychology – Maintain a Gratitude Journal; Charity is beneficial for the giver, too! Handling adversity with fortitude and resilience.

Gita Wisdom for Happiness

Bhagavad-Gita, Sri Krishna’s sermon to Arjuna, enunciates the duties according to dharma, and provides guidance for right thought and right action for attaining salvation; but it also gives many tips for sensible living.

At Kurukshetra, the battle-formations are ready, and the great Dharmayuddha, the war to uphold dharma, is about to begin. But, Arjuna, the peerless warrior and leader of the Pandava army, is not ready; he is sad, depressed, confused, and dis-oriented, torn with doubts about the right path of action. To fight and kill brothers, relatives, and revered elders, or to give up arms and get killed? He asks: If we kill our adversaries, and win the war, would we enjoy the kingdom with our hands stained in blood?

O Krishna, my limbs tremble, mouth is dry, body shivers, Gandiva is unsteady and slipping down, skin is on fire, legs wobble, mind is confused and dis-oriented; everything appears inauspicious to me. I’ve decided not to fight, says Arjuna, and falls silent. Arjuna’s symptoms make a text-book case of a sudden, crippling anxiety-attack!

Sri Krishna’s sermon would resolve Arjuna’s doubts, dissipate his confusion and anxiety, and pull him out of depression. He’d be made ready for war, a metaphor for engaging with the challenges of life.

Of Krishna’s detailed counsel, several provide secular guidance for sensible living. Here are a few examples from Chapter 2:

सुखदुःखे समे कृत्वा लाभालाभौ जयाजयौ ।

ततो युद्धाय युज्यस्व नैवं पापमवाप्स्यसि ॥ २-३८॥

Yuddha may be understood as a metaphor for the formidable challenges of life.

कर्मण्येवाधिकारस्ते मा फलेषु कदाचन ।

मा कर्मफलहेतुर्भूर्मा ते सङ्गोऽस्त्वकर्मणि ॥ २-४७॥

An individual’s best efforts cannot guarantee the desired outcome. Too many variables are at play, several of which are beyond the control of the individual.

योगस्थः कुरु कर्माणि सङ्गं त्यक्त्वा धनञ्जय ।

सिद्ध्यसिद्ध्योः समो भूत्वा समत्वं योग उच्यते ॥ २-४८॥

In an uncertain world, maintaining equanimity and equipose is essential.

दुःखेष्वनुद्विग्नमनाः सुखेषु विगतस्पृहः ।

वीतरागभयक्रोधः स्थितधीर्मुनिरुच्यते ॥ २-५६॥

Do not be distressed by unhappiness, nor be overwhelmed with happiness. Balance is All!

यः सर्वत्रानभिस्नेहस्तत्तत्प्राप्य शुभाशुभम् ।

नाभिनन्दति न द्वेष्टि तस्य प्रज्ञा प्रतिष्ठिता ॥ २-५७॥

Neither exult over a good turn of events, nor grieve for momentary setback.

Postscript

Comments by an esteemed reader

“You have written a comprehensive piece on happiness, one of the most abstract and undefinable feelings. The prescriptions listed in your blog to feel happy are too much to carry out. That is the precise reason why people live their lives and experience happiness and sorrow as they come and rarely follow the regime outlined here.

Happiness like sweetness is a very personal experience, impossible to share. Gurus and scriptures say that fulfilment of desire is not true happiness for new desires would soon crop up. But the truth as we live daily is that desire and its fulfilment, fully or even partially, are the two triggers that propel us to continue living. All that we call progress and has ameliorated our lives has come out of this pursuit; doesn’t matter if it gave the pursuers any happiness.”

My response:

I broadly agree with my esteemed reader, and my response pertains only to his observation: ‘The prescriptions listed in your blog to feel happy are too much to carry out.’

But why are these suggestions for a healthy lifestyle ‘too much’? Why do we take our body for granted, take liberties with it, and mindlessly abuse it? Why do we dump into it food that we know very well as harmful; why do we deprive it of adequate sleep when we know ‘sleep-debt’ is never recovered; why do we sit for hours in front of the idiot box and skip even minimum exercise?

I am reminded of Shiva’s gentle reminder to Parvati, who was performing extraordinarily harsh ascetic austerity, that our first and foremost obligation is to the body - our only instrument for fulfilment of all worldly duties and responsibilities.

Even for believers in rebirth, there is only one life and one body for certain, and the rest are in the domain of faith and speculation. That’s why, every human has a fundamental duty to sustain and nourish her body.

शरीरमाद्यं खलु धर्मसाधनम् (Kumarasambhavam, Canto 5, Verse-33; Kalidasa)

***

 A Memorable Photo

I often marvel at the amazing dexterity of the brain, especially the mysterious ways in which it stores memories. Neurologists and psychologists explain that the human brain has separate storage locations and vaults for short-term and long-term memories, and its filing and retrieval system is so powerful that it easily produces the required data in a jiffy, just like the hard disk of a powerful computer. Except when memory slips in old age and is progressively erased when afflicted with Alzheimer’s. Whenever I can’t recall the name of a person I have known for years, I’m terrified. Is this the onset of the dreaded A…?

There had been a strong shower on Friday night, and forecast of further rain at Bhopal. I was tempted to stay at home and enjoy an unfinished novel, but chose to drive to attend the Saturday Club meeting. It was worth the effort since Mr. D.S. Sood, a former ASI official made an excellent presentation about India’s rehabilitation and conservation project - Ta Prohm – an important monument of the Angkor Wat UNESCO World Heritage Site. Anshu Vaish, former DG, ASI presided over the session.

Angkor Wat at Siem Reap, Cambodia is the largest Hindu temple in the world, originally dedicated to Vishnu, and built by Khmer king Suryavarman-II in the 12^th century AD. With annual tourist arrival of about 26 lakhs, it is one of the most-visited monuments in the world.

(Image Source: Ministry of Tourism, Cambodia)

After the Khmer kings shifted their capital from Siem Reap to Phnom Penh, these monuments fell into ruins. UNESCO designated it as a World Heritage Site in 1992 and began a global rehabilitation and conservation project supported by 30 countries and organizations with France, Japan, India, and Germany as the major contributors. ASI, with funding support from MEA, has been associated with this global initiative since 1986, even prior to its designation as a UNESCO World Heritage Site.

The Hollywood film Lara Croft: Tomb Raider (2001) was partially filmed at Ta Prohm, one of the iconic temples within the Angkor Archaeological Park. This temple, known for its intertwining tree roots of silk cotton and strangler fig trees growing through ancient stone structures, provided a dramatic and atmospheric backdrop for the movie's adventurous and mystical scenes. Angelina Jolie starred as Lara Croft, bringing the video game heroine to life; a Lady James Bond with loads of oomph. Daniel Craig who acted as the tomb raider helping the villains would later play James Bond in Casino Royale (2006) and four other James Bond movies!

Mr Sood presented several interesting slides, and read from his detailed notes. During and after the talk, he answered several queries competently. He is very knowledgeable having been associated with Angkor Wat project since 1986, and has been honoured by Government of Cambodia more than once.

Of the many slides Mr. Sood presented, one lit a bulb in an obscure corner of my brain. The slide showed the wooden bridge across the moat to take the tourists to the temple complex.

Do you remember that bridge? My brain asked.

Of course, I do.

Is this the scene that you recall? The brain brought up a picture post-card with the flourish of a magician.

After Mr Sood’s talk, the vote of thanks, and before the few members in the audience dispersed, I shared the following memory.

A Memorable Photo

A memorable photo of which I have no copy!

Arriving at Siem Reap via Bangkok on a Sunday morning, we spent the better part of the day visiting the heritage site and the monuments with an ASI official as our friendly guide.

The massive, sprawling Angkor Wat temple was impressive even from a distance. Our guide said, ‘The best photos with the entire monument in the backdrop are clicked from this lawn. Once you go nearer, you can only click it in segments.’

We clicked solo and group photos after which we proceeded towards the complex. Before we climbed the wooden bridge to take us across the moat, from among a group of Chinese college students, a girl approached me and said, ‘May I have a photo, please?’

‘Of course,’ I said and waited for her to give me her camera for me to click her photo.

‘No, I want a photo with you.’

A bit amused, I said okay, and she got her friend to click our photo with the Angkor Wat monument in the backdrop.

‘Thank you very much,’ she said with a beaming smile.

‘Why a photo with me?’ I asked.

‘Oh! You’re so handsome,’ she said blushing a little.

Once she and her group of chattering, boisterous, bubbly friends were beyond ear-shot, Anant Swarup, my younger colleague gently rebuked me, ‘Sir, you should have said no.’

Why so? I asked.

‘You’re a senior government official with a sensitive assignment in the Ministry of Commerce, and she could be a Chinese spy preparing a dossier on you.’ Anant wasn’t joking, he was truly concerned.

‘I very much doubt that. I’m no Secretary, but a mere Joint Secretary, a middle-level official. Why would China waste its resources on me? Maybe, Chinese college girls have a thing for middle-aged Indian males; or, the bewitching sunrays made me look a bit like Shah Rukh Khan with kale kale mukhde pe kala kala chasma!’

Thanks, Dear Brain, for that heart-warming recall; but my spouse (who had accompanied me to the meeting) wasn’t amused for I had never shared it with her, dismissing it as a trifling incident.

***

Postscript

When did I visit Angkor Wat, was it 2007 or 2008? Back at home, I checked my old passport: Siem Reap- Arrival: 22 July 2007, Dep: 26 July.

Were you at Siem Reap in July 2007? I texted Mr. Sood.

Yes, I had joined as the ASI Team Leader in May 2007, he replied. 

Mr. Sood, requested by Embassy of India at Phnom Penh, had received us at the Siem Reap airport, and had taken us for the visit to the monuments.

I had forgotten that, but not the incident with the Chinese girl!

***

Notes

Angkor Wat

Angkor derives from the Sanskrit "nagara" (नगर), meaning "city" or "capital." In Khmer, it evolved to "nokor" and then to "Angkor," reflecting its role as the central hub of the Khmer Empire.

Wat derives from Pali/Sanskrit "vatta" (वत्त), meaning "enclosure," "sacred precinct," or "temple." In Khmer, it specifically refers to a Buddhist or Hindu temple complex.

Built in the early 12th century during the reign of King Suryavarman II (1113–1150 CE), it was originally a Hindu temple dedicated to Vishnu, with the central tower representing Mount Meru and the surrounding moat symbolizing the cosmic ocean. Later, when Cambodia transitioned to Buddhism, Angkor Wat became a Buddhist shrine while retaining its Hindu iconography.

“After the Cham people of modern-day Vietnam sacked Angkor in 1177, King Jayavarman VII (reigned 1181–c. 1220) decided that the Hindu gods had failed him. When he built a new capital nearby, Angkor Thom, he dedicated it to Buddhism. Thereafter, Angkor Wat became a Buddhist shrine, and many of its carvings and statues of Hindu deities were replaced by Buddhist art.” (Encyclopaedia Brittanica)

Ta Prohm

In Khmer, Ta means "ancestor," "elder," or "grandfather," conveying respect and reverence. Prohm derives from Sanskrit "Brahma", the Hindu god of creation.

The name "Ta Prohm" can be interpreted as "Ancestor Brahma" or "Grandfather Brahma," reflecting its dedication to spirituality and the veneration of familial and divine lineage.

King Jayavarman VII possibly built this temple for his mother, and installed an idol of her personal deity Prajna Paramita (Saraswati) here. During the Buddhist period, an idol of Avalokiteshvara, one of the most revered Bodhisattvas in Mahayana Buddhism, embodying infinite compassion and mercy, was installed here.

Avalokitesvara

“Avalokiteshvara, in Buddhism, and primarily in Mahayana (“Greater Vehicle”) Buddhism, the bodhisattva (“buddha-to-be”) of infinite compassion and mercy, possibly the most popular of all figures in Buddhist legend.

Avalokiteshvara supremely exemplifies the bodhisattva’s resolve to postpone his own buddhahood until he has helped every sentient being on earth achieve liberation (moksha; literally, “release”) from suffering (dukkha) and the process of death and rebirth (samsara). His name has been variously interpreted as “the lord who looks in every direction” and “the lord of what we see” (that is, the actual created world).

The title invariably used for him in Cambodia and Thailand is Lokeshvara (“Lord of the World”).”

Avalokiteshvara, China

(Quotes & Image: Encyclopaedia Brittanica)

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Dr. Manmohan Singh: A Tribute

April, 2004. I was at AIIMS, New Delhi for an eye test, waiting in the corridor for my turn. I don’t recall why our two daughters had tagged along. Maybe, their annual exams were over, they had a few days off, and I had promised to take them to a book store on our way back.

The girls began fidgeting since the wait was much longer than they had anticipated. Then I noticed a frail patient – a senior citizen in white kurta pajama walking out of the consultant’s room with his medical papers in hand and proceeding to another room down the corridor for a further test, I guess.

Do you know who that gentleman is? I asked my daughters.

He’s a Sardar, said the youngest.

Well, I’ve seen his photo in the papers, but can’t remember his name, said the eldest.

He’s Dr. Manmohan Singh, our former Finance Minister, and at present the Leader of Opposition, I said.

Do you note anything special about him? I asked.

The girls waited for me to elaborate.

‘He’s all by himself. No chaperon, not even a relative. Had he so wished, he could have called the Director, AIIMS to avail of VIP treatment. But here he is, walking the corridors of AIIMS, and queueing up to meet the Consultant.’

I think my daughters got what I wished to convey.

Dr. Singh was sworn in as Prime Minister on May 22, 2004; and for a 2^nd time on May 22, 2009.

Rest in Peace, Dr Manmohan Singh- humble professor, economist, former FM, former PM- with a frail body but a feisty spirit; and on whose lean shoulders the weight of power and position sat ever so lightly.  

***

Postscript

Several colleagues and friends have shared their own fond memories of Dr. Manmohan Singh, a few which are given below.

He not only impressed world leaders, peers, colleagues, opponents, and critics with his intelligence, integrity, quiet determination, and unwavering commitment to serve the people of India; but also all left a mark on all who came in touch with him, in his own gentle manner.

Hema Ramanujam, spouse of R. Ramanujam

‘I had an interesting and soul touching interaction with Dr Manmohan Singh when he was the PM in 2012.

My husband was then Secretary to the PM and we had been invited to a dinner at the PM’s residence. It was a fairly large gathering and  Honourable PM and Mrs. Kaur were moving around and meeting the guests individually. When the PM came to us, I thought since we didn’t have to be introduced, he would just smile and move across. Instead, he stopped and started to speak to me with folded hands and all seriousness:

“Mrs Ramanujam, your husband has been given a massive responsibility in the PMO. He has to work long hours. If you think he is neglecting the family, I’m responsible for this. I’m sorry.”

I was stunned at this completely unexpected statement coming from the host who was no less a person than the Prime Minister of the country. I didn’t know how to respond. Probably mumbled something that it was my husband’s duty and it was nothing new for me as he had always had jobs that required him to work hard. It was amazing that the PM was so humble and could spontaneously say what a wife would ideally like to hear. No wonder he could easily disarm even his worst critics with his soft spoken, caring, warm and friendly disposition. A truly great leader who impressed and inspired with his professional competence and human values!!

Sharing a pic of that meeting:

R. Ramanujam

I had myself been floored when I made a courtesy call on him soon after joining. He had asked me to generally share my experiences in civil service and I counted back from the year 2011 to 2000. I thought I should not take more of his time and about to pause when he interrupted me and said you have also worked in Vajpayee’s PMO. He then listed a number of things he would like me to drive from the PMO on his behalf and finally asked me if I had anything to say. I said I would try to live up to his expectations and indeed felt blessed to have been picked up for such a prestigious assignment. His reply was “No, no . We are the ones who are fortunate to have your services”. It was a pleasure to interact with him whenever I met him for briefing on specific issues. Have very fond memories. May he attain supreme and lasting bliss.

S.C. Khuntia, my batchmate, and a dear friend.

‘I was Director in DEA when Dr. Manmohan Singh was FM. For some time, I was looking after Europe, and there used to be many dignitaries like FMs of other countries. As Director, I used to brief him before the visit, and then remain present during the meetings. He was very thorough, gentle, and courteous with everybody. He would go through the notes in the file carefully. Many times, he had marked portions of my notes as Director, and referred to the same in his notes while approving proposals.

I handled one of his visits to Germany to attend an Indo-German bilateral economic cooperation meeting, and he was regarded very highly by the German FM, and team. His talk to their Chamber of Commerce was superb.

As Joint Secretary, there were many occasions to meet him during presentations and he was always a keen listener and gracious. I had met him in Bangalore once in ISEC, where he attended a discussion at the invitation of Prof. Govind Rao, and another time in 2017 when he came to inaugurate the academic session of Dr. Ambedkar School of Economics.’

 

Hail Hilsa: Queen of Fish

For no reason, yesterday I recalled a familiar Odia saying: chakiri kariba Polisi, maacha khaiba Ilishi (Dream job: Police, Tastiest Fish: Ilishi!). Hilsa, the Queen of Fish, is for the Bengalis Ilish, to be pronounced Ileeeesh with a loving, lingering caress! I rushed to the BHEL weekly market and bought a hilsa fish weighing 890 grams, much less than the ideal size of 1.5 kgs, but a great catch for Bhopal market. I’m not telling you the price; that’s easy to figure out, just ask Google.

Never had I bought a hilsa; never even searched for it at Bhopal assuming the Bengalis who every year import large consignments of Padma ilish from Bangladesh were most unlikely to allow this precious commodity to cross their state border.

‘Bengali Cut?’ the fish-seller asked. I nodded with no idea what that was. When he came to make the last piece with the tail, he held it for my inspection, and asked again, ‘Okay?’ Make it smaller, I said. He instantly knew I was no Bengali, and had never bought Hilsa.

Back at home, I looked up two You Tube recipes for ‘Sorisher Ilish (Hilsa cooked in freshly-ground mustard paste),’ for I had once enjoyed that dish at Oh!Calcutta near Chittaranjan Park, New Delhi. Even though the Hindi video maker claimed to be a Bengali, I followed the video in chaste Bengali. Overhearing from the sidelines a perplexed spouse asked: Gud goes into that recipe? No, I said, the chef is suggesting a few spoonfuls of halad gu(n)d, haldi powder.

Requested spouse to stay away from the kitchen, and not interfere with my maiden tryst with ilishi. Once I begin cooking, I never revert to the videos, confident that my memory serves good for the ingredients and the recipe.

I finished cooking in about 30 mins. Next time, I can do it even faster if all the ingredients are neatly lined up at the cooking platform.

Result: Wow! Is there more rice, I asked, and the cook said, ‘I made as much rice as every day, and it is never finished. Sorry.’ Chef with a Dash had cooked so delicious a sorisher hilsa curry that we ran out of rice to go with it!

Here is the proof of the Tryst with Hilsa:

I dedicate this blog to Shri B.K. Saha who taught me decades ago Lotus 123 (ancestor of MS Excel), and once took me to the fish market at Indore to teach me an essential life-skill - how to buy pabda fish.

Tell me, how would you know that the fish is fresh, he asked?

You inspect the gill, it should be blood-red; was my smart reply.

You’ve no experience, it is evident. The smart fish-sellers apply a little colour to the gill to fool novice buyers like you.

This is how you evaluate the fish, he said, picking up a fish and sniffing it briefly. No seller can hide the smell of fish that isn’t fresh, he said from years of experience of buying and cooking fish. He sent us a serving of pabda sorisher curry cooked by himself. That was truly yummy. Thank you, Shri Saha.

Hilsa Diplomacy

Hilsa catch in West Bengal is dwindling over the years, a matter of grave concern and culinary crisis for the Bengalis in Kolkata, Assam, and Tripura.

After Sheikh Hasina’s ouster, with Professor Muhammad Yunus taking oath on August 7, 2024; it was feared that Bangladesh would enforce total ban on export of Hilsa to India. However, such is the persuasive power of the Bengalis of India that the Ministry of Foreign Affairs of  Bangladesh on 21 September, 2024 permitted export of 3000 MTs of Padma ilish - believed to be the most delicious and connoisseurs’ delight - through the Petrapole border, despite the aggravating diplomatic tension between the two countries, as a Pujo Gift! Fish, for the Bengalis, transcends politics.

How to Savour Hilsa

Hilsa is no pedestrian stuff like alu or begun (brinjal), and must not be eaten casually but with the reverence appropriate for partaking prasad which is received by the devout in small servings with the choicest portions reserved for those members of the family who matter more than others. Never to be eaten on the go or while standing; Hilsa is no fast-food and must not be served for buffet meals which would constitute a grave insult to the Queen of Fish. The partaker must be seated preferably on the floor on a mat with mind fully focussed on the sacred act of enjoying the heavenly taste of the fish that swam from the Bay of Bengal to Padma or Hooghly to delight the palate of an entire household.

Once a generous portion of rice is heaped on the plate and the maachher jhol with a piece (or two, if it’s your lucky day) of Hilsa topped with several green chilis sliced vertically are placed before you; first take in the aroma wafting from the steaming curry as you would sniff a bottle of premium wine after the first sample is poured; size up the piece (big, small, head, or tail) in your curry and devise the best strategy to make the most of it. You’re a bhadralok, no uncultured, famished barbarian; and hence the piece must not be greedily devoured but be made to last till all rice is finished in sync with the last morsel of the fish and the last drop of the jhol.

Before you begin your meal, remember to say a silent prayer to God who created Hilsa; Varun (the Lord of Oceans), and Ganga (the river goddess) who nurtured the exquisite fish, and nudged it to swim from the seas to fresh water to breed. Thereafter, profusely and intermittently thank the lady of the house – the presiding deity of the kitchen – who cooked the delicious curry.

Now, proceed to enjoy Hilsa mindfully, staying fully focussed as in a session of meditation under the watchful eyes of a Master. Hilsa is packed with nutrition, tastes great, but is generously endowed with numerous fine bones which have the uncanny ability to lodge in your throat; surely a protective mechanism evolved by the cunning fish. It is also a parable for Life. Eating Hilsa is like a journey to the heaven of culinary delight, but the path is not a bed of roses but strewn with many thorns to negotiate which you must have the intelligence, wisdom, patience, and skill. No risk, no gain.

Noronha’s Fish Curry

On 26th January 1958, Mr. R.C.V.P. Noronha (ICS:1938), Commissioner, Jabalpur was on tour to Narsinghpur. Mrs. Noronha and their three children were also with him.   They stayed at the picturesque Barman Rest House overlooking the majestic Narmada. The next day, Mr. Noronha was to inspect Gadarwara Tehsil.

Mr. Noronha was very fond of angling. He caught a fish from Narmada, made a nice curry, and invited Mr. Manohar Keshav (IAS:1953), Collector, Narsinghpur to dine with him. The fish curry was delicious and eaten with much relish. Unfortunately, a fishbone got stuck in Mr. Noronha’s throat and caused him much distress.

Assistant Surgeon, Narsinghpur was called in. He was a Bengali. No problem, he said. Just make a big ball of rice and swallow it at once. That’d fix the problem. Much tried and tested, Sir, he said.

Mr. Noronha tried the prescribed remedy more than once, but no sooner did he put the ball of rice into his mouth than he began to chew vigorously as was his habit. He failed since he had never before swallowed a big ball of rice at once.

He abandoned his proposed inspection of Gadarwara tehsil and rushed back to Jabalpur to have the fishbone removed by a surgeon.

A fish from Narmada ended up on the dining table but took sweet revenge by causing some pain and distress to the angler and also aborting the stern Commissioner’s Inspection, much to the relief of the Collector, SDO, Tehsildar and the office staff.

***

Note:

1. As narrated by Mr. Manohar Keshav to the author on 01.09.2016.

2. R. C. V. P. Noronha was the longest-serving Chief Secretary of Madhya Pradesh (1963-68 & 1972-74). Chitra Mishra has written an excellent memoir of the legendary officer for which the link is:

Remembering Noronha (1916-1982), the Legendary Officer – Tryst with Dholpur House (wordpress.com)

3. A Tale Told by an Idiot by Mr. Noronha is a must read for all civil servants. The book has been translated by Mr. I. S. Dani into Hindi: Ek Anadi ki Kahani.

***

Postscript 

Limericks by G. Subbu, my friend 

Mr Noronha caught a fish ,
Made a curry that he thought he would relish ,
The vengeful fish, although dead , had a mind of its own ,
In the commissioner's throat, got stuck as a bone ,
And the angler rushed to the hospital in anguish !

A few old ones on Illish ;-)

The new Bangla govt is so selfish ,
Has banned the export of Illish ,
How will a Bong celebrate Durga Puja ,
Without his dose of Macch - Hilsa ,
Isn't this policy a bit hawkish ?

odi baaba, they all exclaimed in unison,
Ei tho punishment bheeshhon,
For the ilish,
Is not just any feesh,
It's nothing short of a cultural starvashon !!

Long ago , due to the crook Churchill ,
The famine brought Bengal to a standstill,
Mohd Yunus , the Nobel Prize economist ,
Has now shown a tight fist,
The Hilsa ban, during Puja , certainly sounds quite shrill !

Brinjal of the Sea

Dr. R. Kannan, a dear friend and a distinguished scholar sent me this quote, ‘Fish are the brinjal of the sea- Yagyanvalkya.’ I looked for the Sanskrit quote but without success. ChatGPT tells me that though the quote is sometimes attributed to Yagyanvalkya, it is not factual. Yagyanvalkya was a revered rishi mentioned in Brihadaranyaka  Upanishad, but his philosophical contemplation did not include such mundane matters as fish and brinjal.
CoPilot fished out the Sanskrit phrase that conveys the idea that "Fish is the brinjal of the seas":
मीनः सागरे वर्तकः" (Meenah Saagare Vartakah)
- मीनः (Meenah): Fish
- सागरे (Saagare): In the sea
- वर्तकः (Vartakah): Brinjal/Eggplant

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